I was recently informed by a co-worker that while on his way to work he saw a black man rollerskating and eating a watermelon. Now i can't stop picturing this in my mind, it makes me smile every fucking time. This is the greatest image ever to grace my brain.....yeah thats right I said grace my brain. Lets break this down.
First you got the black man part, it's mildly entertaining i guess. I actually pictured a skinny homeless black guy wearing Flashdance-esqe clothing on (leotard and leg warmers). With huge 1970's headphones.
Secondly you got the rollerskating part...not rollerblading but actually ROLLERSKATING. I can just see him doing that crazy rolling backwards move or the bend down, stick out one leg and roll on one skate thing.
Lastly you got the eating watermelon thing. I really have nothing to say about that. But you picture that all together and it's just to good to be true.
Finally I just want to add that the greatest display of homeless shame that i've witnessed came one day when me and Captain Naps where on our way through Boston Common going to Fenway Park (um...on an alternate Earth somewhere in Space). We saw a black, drunk and very high homeless guy begging for change while wearing a full Cat in the Hat costume ... and this was a damn good costume too, not that cheap vinyl crap, this bad boy had like real fur. Very funny stuff.
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True story:
I was on a plane last month sitting a couple aisles behind this black family. At the end of the flight, wheneverybody stood up to collect their bags and stuff, the black, teenage boy opened up the overhead compartment and pulled out a basketball. Seriously. That was his only carry-on item. Weird.
My God, that's classic. Why would you carry-on a basketball...EVER! Black kids love basketballs though.
black people sure like basketball. was he planning on playing it on the way to the hotel????
speaking of blacks, i hate interracial porn. i mean, who wants to see that??? its like a national geographic special gone horribly wrong.
also i cant wait to the new film Hounddog comes out. it looks hot.
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