People of Earth!!.......Your a bunch of retards!! Your planet is ravaged by disease and destruction...yet, your fine minds are busy working on THAT crap! A lap pillow for lonely Japanese men. Here's the arcticle...i will comment throughout.
'Lap Pillow' Offers Solace to Lonely Men
(The day that i'm so lonely that I buy a polyurethene lap, is the day that I blow my friggin' brains out)
One popular item for holiday shoppers is the "lap pillow," with skin-colored polyurethene calves folded under soft thighs -- a comfy cushion for napping, reading or watching television. (Skin-colored polyurethene calves?? Just what I always wanted in a women)
The 9,429 yen ($90!!!!) pillow, which comes with one red and one black skirt (for the lonely man who cares what color skirt his pillow is wearing), went on sale in late November and maker Trane Co Ltd says shipments have reached 3,000 in just a few weeks. (3,000 pathetic dudes huh...for shame)
"We created this item to help tired people relax," (I agree that masturbating IS a good way to relax) said Makoto Igarashi, Trane's managing director. (Makoto is my cousin)
Care was taken with details such as the softness of the thighs, panty lines on the pillow's "backside" and wrinkles in the lap of the skirt so as to make the pillow look and feel as real as possible. (Ok....thats disturbing)
"We thought our main customers would be men in their 20s, but even men in their 60s are buying it (Ok.....thats also disturbing)," Igarashi said.
At stores, lap pillows gather crowds where people poke and pry at the foam legs. (Ha ha ha....Japs are so funny)
"I think this may be good for single men, but it could cause trouble for someone who is married," said Shingo Shibata. (Um....yes....because a married man may somehow have sex with it?? Granted it briefly crossed my mind on the possibilities of having sex with a pillow in the shape of a womens lap...but it's just not practicle)
Man: I'm leaving you.
Wife: FOR WHO!
Man: Maria
Wife: WHO's THAT?!?!
Man: ......my lap pillow.
Wife: .....but it has no torso!!
Man: ......ha ha ha ..... EXACTLY!
Whats wrong with Japanese men? Is it really that bad over there? They seem to have no shame at all, I would be totally ashamed to own that. To have it as a joke is one thing, but it doesn't seem to be a joke to these dudes. How do you explain it to like your parents or something?
Dad: "Whats this son?
Guy: ...um thats my pillow?
Dad: ....hmm it's kinda disturbing, what does it feel like?
Guy: DON'T!
Dad: oooh its all wet.
Guy: ......um......I drool.
Whatever....all i'm saying is that this invention is PATHETIC, DISTURBING and MORONIC......i want one.
3 comments:
I had a talking "Ultimate Warrior" pillow.....but I swear I never touched it. .....um....they had that on my planet....for some reason.
I'm not going to buy a fake woman's lap unless there's a huge, gaping vagina on it. What's the point?
Good point....but it still has no torso?? It's like a sex toy for a necropheliac.
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